SANJANA'S POV:

I wasn't thinking my first intimate act would be like this when he asked me to remove my clothes. Denial was on my tongue, but I did not want to argue with him for the first conversation we held. If I want this to be easier, I have to be the partner I promised to be before expecting something from him. 

He may not attempt to understand or come to me immediately, but definitely 

so I did

 I  wanted to receive as much as pleasure he did from the act . I was just a little too shy when my thong came off. What did he expect when it was my first time this close to a man and anticipating  to see some thing between my legs deeply unsettled me. 

Then came the bite between my neck and shoulders. I couldn't do this. I tried pushing him away but he held me down and I couldn't have the courage to go against him. 

So I just let him in. 

All I wanted was to get it over with. When we were done and panting, he didn't offer me any comfort. He went ahead and cleaned himself. All the while I felt used and deep disgust for myself. I don't know this feeling. I've never experienced something like this. 

When he came back from the bathroom, he stood watching me. I got up to clean myself. The moment reminded me of my bruised flesh between my legs. I looked down on sore blood and liquid. The sight filled me with anguish. He was drying his hair in the closet while I limped to the bathroom. hair in the closet while I limped to the bathroom. I looked at myself in the mirror and the right, the side that greeted me was not what I am and I wore back. My neck and breasts were filled with dark purple marks. The bite between at the end of my neck was brutal. It had small red dots on it. That's it. I can't look at myself any further. 

I showered and came back directly to the bed in a robe. I couldn't bring myself to wear a nightwear. He was checking his phone. I dropped myself on the bed and switched off the lamp. I turned to my side, my hand under my head.

 After a while, I heard a rustle. He kept his phone aside setting to sleep . Extreme sadness engulfed me. The sobs wracked  through me as the exhaustion  weighed down on me. He might have heard me, but I couldn't bother now. I myself did not know why i felt this way when he didn't promise me any kindness .I slowly drifted to sleep, my cheeks wet with tears. 

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The next morning I woke up, my head was hurting from the last night's weep. The sunlight slipping through the curtains did not erase the darkness the room held. More particularly after what happened last night.

No matter how positive I forced myself to be, I can't change the fact that my life was hundred times worse than what it was two weeks back.

Was it worth it? I don't know if i will have successful marriage. My future looked scarier in this mansion, having no one to talk to. I should ask him if i can bring a pet for myself. what will he say? 

The knock at the door caught my attention. It clearly is not him if there was a knock. "Yeah?" I asked from the bed. I cringed from the roughness of my voice.

"Sir expects you at the breakfast, ma'am" Anandi's voice came through the door.

" I want to have breakfast in my room" I replied.

I cannot go down and have breakfast in this condition. I lifted myself off the bed and though the soreness was present, the pain lessened compared to what it was last night. I should be stronger for myself. After last night, I don't know what to expect from him. I should focus on what I can do to make this better. I should start having a proper conversation with him and get to know him as a person. Last night was difficult but I will make him know that I can't handle the aggressiveness he held and I would be more better than what he expects me to be if he would be kinder. I freshened up and came out of the bathroom in a towel. I walked up to the closet, my hands reaching for my bag. I should have unpacked my bags . I sighed . today, maybe I can ask a maid for help.

" Sanjana" Abhay 's voice, boomed into the room, making my shoulders jump at the sound. I turned to see him already dressed up in his political kurta, hair styled to the back.

He marched up to me and I stepped back facing him. His hand went to my hair, pulling at them, making my head arch up.

" Aaaah "

"you denied coming for the breakfast?" he gritted angrily, his forehead nerve popping. He looked lethal up close. I can't believe this is his behavior after what i went through.

"No, I just wanted to have it in my room"

I said through the pain, my hands gripped his hand trying to get them off.

"Don't make me repeat. Just come down to the table"

He declared and turned around to leave, not waiting for my  reply.

"No" I spoke defiantly. I must have gone insane for. Speaking this way. But this is getting out of hand. If i won't speak up.

He turned around, just stared at me.

" I am tired and sore. I can't come down. Your arrogant ass can listen for once. Why do you want everything happening your way?" I shouted at him. My voice came out strained. No matter how much patience i  mustered up , my body gave up to listen anymore.

"You can't command and-" . Before I can register, the sound of slap resonated in t he room , my head bent to the side. my hand shot up to the cheek, ,clutching it as it throbbed painfully.

I raised my head up and looked at him angrily through tears.